Sunday, August 4, 2013

Cara Delevingne at a Joseph exhibition

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Newbie

Hi! I am on day 2 here and I must say I love this app. It really keeps me motivated and I know I will stay on track. My goal is to lose about 30lbs working in increments of 10. The analysis is really an eye opener.

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Fashion Designer Mara Hoffman Teams Up with Sebastian Hair Care

Fashion addicts looking for fabulous, lush hair, rejoice: Designer Mara Hoffman has joined forces with Sebastian Professional to create an UH-MAY-ZING limited edition designer gift available now in salons. The whole shebang comes with Sebastian Professional's Volupt shampoo and conditioner, plus a punchy, print headscarf that Hoffman created exclusively for Sebastian, but was inspired by the designs in her Spring 2013 collection.

Of the scarf, Hoffman said, "It's great for versatility; it can be worn in multiple ways and is a fun way to incorporate a great print into any outfit."

Shopping for new spring stuff can put a huge dent in your pocket, but the set, which has a $120 value, will retail for only $25 bucks at Sebastian-approved salons. You can add this to your essentials for spring to help give your wardrobe a fresh look. Bonus: Try this really chic way to rock your scarf post purchase.

--Monifa Hewitt

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Big Brother: A Novel

Hi, I was wondering if anyone has read Big Brother by Lionel Shriver? I would recommend it as a good read.  In short, it begins as the narrator is preparing to meet her brother after not seeing him for several years. She is self conscious about the 20 pounds she has gained since seeing him last, and is sure that he will tease her about this. To her shock he has gained several hundred pounds and she finds herself speechless.  I won't give anymore away.

I purchased this book after hearing the author on the Diane Rehm show (NPR). Apparently, it was inspired by her actual brother who passed away from weight related complications.  What got my attention was the number of calls and emails protesting the authors use of the word 'fat' and also the entire subject in general. I can understand that no person should be obligated to have a discussion about a personal issue with a well meaning (or just noisy) relative or friend, but I can't really see that the topic is off limits on the radio. Obviously, maybe I am asking the wrong people since if you are on this site, you are probably open to discussing weight issues, but what do you think? At any rate, if you need something to read take a look at this book. 


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Would You Try Aqua Spinning?

Aqua spin, hydro ride, pool biking, aqua cycling...whatever you want to call it, the low-impact workout that's hugely popular across Europe in countries like France, Italy and Germany, is finally making a splash in the States, too. And let us tell you -- it's definitely interesting!

Currently, the Euro trend is being offered at only a handful of places in the United States and the first boutique underwater cycling studio opened its doors to curious New Yorkers this past week. Three ambitious SELF staffers (myself and my editor included) tested the hydro bikes at AQUASpin, a gorgeous TriBeCa studio that boasts modern, Zen-like decor that felt more like a Russian bathhouse than a gym. "I just want to live here!" a student in our class gushed.

But the new trendy studio, with its pint-sized pool is oceans away from the high energy, lane-to-lane packed pools in many European classes, which often take place outdoors with the instructor on a bike on deck. (Need a visual? Check out the crazy YouTube vids.)

As for the workout itself? "It sort of feels like getting a lymphatic massage," when the water waves against your legs, said my editor, who noted she could understand why the exercise claims to fight cellulite. Another participant loved the abs section of the workout -- we propped up our feet on the bike handles and laid back to work the core and perform crunches. Dangerous? Maybe -- some of our heads were super close to the pool deck, but our instructor made us aware of that fact prior to the set.

While we can't see ourselves regularly attending aqua spinning, it is a fun way to break up your routine every once in a while, great for people with injuries or a joint pain and frankly, crazy fun! Not gonna lie--we were all sweating by the end!

Until the craze goes national, catch the wave at one of these studios in the U.S.:

Tell us: Would you try aqua spinning? Tweet us at @SaraAngle22 and @SELFMagazine!

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Image Credit: Courtesy of AQUAStudio NY


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Salma Hayek and Adam Sandler at the Sony Pictures Entertainment event in Las Vegas

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Getting frustrated!!!!

Hey all,

I'm new to this forum but I really need some advice.  For the past 3 months I've been dieting and working out at the gym. I go 4-5 days a week and do 35-40 min of cardio and 15-25 min high repition/low weight lifting.  I've been using "My Fitness Pal" app to track my eating and am trying to hit around 1500-1800 calories a day, sometimes I'm under, sometimes I meet it.  I am 35, 5'10, 250-255lbs (started at 270lbs), and while I'm seeing my clothes fitting better I'm not seeing the scale drop ANYTHING.  Yes I lost the initial weight but I feel like I'm at a stand still and last night I weighed myself and it seems like I've gained weight.  I've tried taking Safflower Seed pills to help with my metabolism, which is probably dead after eating whatever I wanted and drinking Diet Mt Dew for years, but I just feel at a ledge and I don't know what to do.  I'm working my ass off but it's LITERALLY still there.  Any advice would help, should I see a doctor, do I need to cut down on my calories? Thank you.


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Adidas Supports Boston, The Deets Behind BB Creams and More!

Adidas, the official sponsor of the Boston Marathon, has launched a limited-edition "Boston Stands as One" t-shirt. 100% of the proceeds will go to The One Fund Boston, Inc., to help those affected by the tragedy. [Adidas]

Everyone's into BB creams, but which ones really get the job done? Click through to find out. [Fashionista]

One of the toughest parts of redecorating? Not screwing up your new paint job. Get it right with these tips. [BuzzFeed]

If you're a runner and not already foam rolling, you gotta start. It helps stiff muscles and prevents injury. [POPSUGAR Fitness]

Artichokes are obviously delicious and awesome for you, but, uh, how do you cut 'em? It's simple! Learn how here. [NYTimes]

Image Credit: Courtesy of Adidas


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Thin Kids, Weight Problems

Thin Kids: Why the Scale Doesn't Matter webmd.ads.adSeedCall = function() { var self = this; var defer = new jQuery.Deferred(); // need a set a 1 second timeout here to resolve it if the ad call hangs // if we get to 1 seconds, resolve the deferred object self.adSeedCallTimeout = setTimeout(function(){ defer.resolve(); webmd.debug('timeout happened'); },1000); // grabs pageview id out of global scope and makes sure it exists as we need to pass it to ads in that case var pageviewId = window.s_pageview_id || ''; // save out the PB iFrame URL as we need to clean it up var iframeURLOutOfPB = '//as.webmd.com/html.ng/transactionID=896586481&tile=2063087126&tug=&pug=__&site=2&affiliate=20&hcent=11958&scent=1190&pos=5200&xpg=3609&sec=8006&au1=&au2=&uri=%2fparenting%2fraising-fit-kids%2fmove%2fskinny-kid-unhealthy&artid=091e9c5e80cd206a&inst=0&leaf=&cc=10&tmg=&bc=_diet_age1_&mcent=12001µ=¶ms.styles=json01&pvid=' + pageviewId; // remove the ampersands. This regex is cleaner than trying to drop it into an element and all that, as all we want it to replace the &'s var cleanIframeURL = iframeURLOutOfPB.replace(/&/g, '&'); // using require instead of webmd.load as we will eventually depracate webmd.load require([cleanIframeURL], function(){ // if you get here before the timeout, kill it clearTimeout(self.adSeedCallTimeout); // go ahead and resolve the deferred object. We will wait for lotame defer to be done, if it exists though // that allows us to make sure the lotame audience values are in the ads_perm cookie (or timeout occurred) // // if the ad call took forever and the deferred object was already resolved with the timeout, that is ok // because of deferred functionality, it will not be resolved again. Thanks jQuery if(webmd.object.get('webmd.lotame.defer')) { webmd.lotame.defer.done( function(){ defer.resolve(); } ); } else { defer.resolve(); } webmd.debug('actual seed call came back'); } ); return defer.promise(); } webmd.ads.adSeedCallPromise = webmd.ads.adSeedCall(); // self executing function for scope (function(){ // grabs pageview id out of global scope and makes sure it exists as we need to pass it to ads in that case var pageviewId = window.s_pageview_id || ''; var iframeURLOutOfPB = '//as.webmd.com/html.ng/transactionID=896586481&tile=2063087126&tug=&pug=__&site=2&affiliate=20&hcent=11958&scent=1190&pos=101&xpg=3609&sec=8006&au1=&au2=&uri=%2fparenting%2fraising-fit-kids%2fmove%2fskinny-kid-unhealthy&artid=091e9c5e80cd206a&inst=0&leaf=&segm=0&cc=10&tmg=&bc=_diet_age1_&mcent=12001µ=&pvid=' + pageviewId; var cleanIframeURL = iframeURLOutOfPB.replace(/&/g, '&'); // here we will use some of the ad params in the XSL to populate webmd.ads.params // we could move to use this param object to create ads instead of the URL above, but that will require a fundemental // change to webmd.ads, as the refresh function takes the "src" tag instead of individual params // something to look into as far as the future webmd.ads.params = { 'affiliate':'20', 'hcent':'11958', 'scent':'1190', 'xpg':'3609', /* leaf is all weird coming out of the XSL so we have to do this hack to it */ 'leaf':'&leaf='.replace(/&leaf=/, ''), 'site':'2', 'transactionID':'896586481', 'tile':'2063087126' } var ad = { adLocation:'banner', adURL:cleanIframeURL, trans:'896586481', tile:'2063087126', pos:'101' }; // check to make sure this seed call functionality exists, if it does, dooo it if(webmd.object.exists('webmd.ads.handleAdSeedCall')) { webmd.ads.handleAdSeedCall(ad); } })(); Skip to content WebMD: Better information. Better health. Enter Search Keywords. Use the arrow keys to navigate suggestions. Health A-Z

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Track your way to weight loss success Manage your family's vaccinations Join the conversation See more benefits Sign Up Why WebMD? My WebMD Show Menu My Tools My WebMD Pages My Account Sign Out FacebookTwitterPinterest WebMD Home next page Health & Parenting Center next page Raising Fit Kids next page Move Email a Friend Print Article if (pf_param == "true") {printElements();} Raising Fit Kids: Healthy Nurtition, Exercise, and Weight   This content is selected and controlled by WebMD's editorial staff in collaboration with Sanford Health Systems.False Is Your Skinny Kid Unhealthy? WebMD Feature

By Mary Jo DiLonardo

Reviewed By Hansa D. Bhargava, MD

Sometimes the scale doesn't matter. Your child might be at a healthy weight -- her body mass index (BMI) is in the normal range and she doesn't look like she has extra pounds.

But looks can be deceiving. If your child doesn't move enough and doesn't eat well, being at a healthy weight doesn't always mean she's actually fit and healthy. The goal for all parents should be to help their kids adopt healthy habits now, so you can help them avoid health problems like diabetes and heart issues related to being unfit.

Experts agree that a person's weight is not always a clear sign of good or bad health or fitness level.

Carl Lavie, MD, medical director of cardiac rehabilitation and prevention at the John Ochsner Heart and Vascular Institute in New Orleans, says the key is being physically fit -- especially getting aerobic exercise. "The people who are unfit, it almost doesn’t matter if they're thin or fat."

Lavie was one of the first researchers to document the "obesity paradox," which found that people who are overweight sometimes live longer and are healthier than people who are thinner.

"If you just look at weight alone, it can be very misleading," Lavie says. "Weight is both fat and muscle. You can have somebody who is normal weight but they don’t have any muscle and they're all fat. On the other hand, you [can] have someone who has pretty high weight and BMI and they're low fat -- like a middle linebacker in the NFL who is huge, but solid muscle."

Then Why Weigh?

Weight isn't the perfect predictor of good health. But it's still an important piece of information.

Weight and BMI give you and your child's doctor a basic idea of health, says Jeffrey Schwimmer, MD, director of the Weight and Wellness Center, Rady Children’s Hospital-San Diego. If your child isn't in the "normal" range, he may eventually be more likely to have certain health problems, like high blood pressure, heart disease, and liver disease.

The doctor will also care if someone in your family has a history of health problems like high blood pressure, type-2 diabetes, or fatty liver disease. Family history is a key part of your health information.

A Parent's Responsibility

As a parent, your job is to help your child build healthy habits, says Stephanie Walsh, MD, medical director for child wellness at Children's Healthcare of Atlanta.

Make sure they're active 60 minutes a day. "Are they out there playing and getting sweaty? They need to breathe hard and be a little stinky so you know they're really moving," Walsh says. Fill up half their plates with fruits and vegetables. Give them water, not sugary drinks. Be sure they get plenty of sleep. "If you don’t get enough sleep, everything seems worse," Walsh says. "Lack of sleep puts our bodies at significant stress." Limit screen time, including computers, phones, TV, and video games. 1 2 Go to next page #url_reference {display: none};#url_reference { display: block; line-height: 150%; margin-bottom: 10px; }#logo_rdr img { visibility: visible; }.titleBar_rdr .titleBarMiddle_fmt { padding-top: 1.5em;}   For Kids and Parents. Kid Tested. Expert Approved. 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Healthy Recipe Finder BMI Calculator and Height Predictor // self executing function for scope (function(){ // grabs pageview id out of global scope and makes sure it exists as we need to pass it to ads in that case var pageviewId = window.s_pageview_id || ''; var iframeURLOutOfPB = '//as.webmd.com/html.ng/transactionID=896586481&tile=2063087126&tug=&pug=__&site=2&affiliate=20&hcent=11958&scent=1190&pos=113&xpg=3609&sec=8006&au1=&au2=&uri=%2fparenting%2fraising-fit-kids%2fmove%2fskinny-kid-unhealthy&artid=091e9c5e80cd206a&inst=0&leaf=&segm=0&cc=10&tmg=&bc=_diet_age1_&mcent=12001µ=&pvid=' + pageviewId; var cleanIframeURL = iframeURLOutOfPB.replace(/&/g, '&'); var ad = { adLocation:'left', adURL:cleanIframeURL, trans:'896586481', tile:'2063087126', pos:'113' }; // check to make sure this seed call functionality exists, if it does, dooo it if(webmd.object.exists('webmd.ads.handleAdSeedCall')) { webmd.ads.handleAdSeedCall(ad); } })(); This Week on Fit from WebMD and Sanford Sad Feel Better When You're Sad Stretch 3 Stretches for Kids girl face Got Finals? Tackle Test Stress Today in Raising Fit Kids star shaped broccoli snacks Slideshow Fast, Not-So-Boring Breakfasts mother kissing sleeping son Video Solving Bedtime Battles   Woman watching family playing soccer Evaluator How Fit Is Your Family? teens posing in prom garb fitSlideshow Beat Teen Prom Stress   .messaging_content{background-image:url("http://img.staging.webmd.com/dtmcms/staging/webmd/consumer_assets/site_images/sponsored_programs/fit-initiative/sms/message_back.png");background-repeat:no-repeat; width: 314px; height: 460px;font-family:Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;padding-top: 10px;padding-left: 10px;position:relative;}.sign_up{font-size:31px;color:#f58220;font-weight:bold;margin-top: 0px;}.fit_kids{}.six_weeks{font-size:25px;color:#f58220;font-weight:bold;margin-top: 30px;}.orange_icon{}.know_more{font-size:10pt;margin-left: 2px;margin-top: 0px;margin-bottom: 3px;float:left;}.info_icon{background-image:url("http://img.staging.webmd.com/dtmcms/staging/webmd/consumer_assets/site_images/sponsored_programs/fit-initiative/sms/info_icon.png");background-repeat:no-repeat; width: 12px; height: 11px;float:left;margin-top: 3px;margin-left: 6px;cursor:pointer;cursor:hand;}.info_icon_bottom{background-image:url("http://img.staging.webmd.com/dtmcms/staging/webmd/consumer_assets/site_images/sponsored_programs/fit-initiative/sms/info_icon.png");background-repeat:no-repeat; width: 12px; height: 11px;cursor:pointer;cursor:hand;position: absolute;left: 115px;top: 89px;}.messaging_content .checkbox{float:left;}.messaging_content span{font-weight:normal;text-decoration: italic;}.selection_label{font-size:10pt;font-weight:bold;margin-left: 25px;width: 270px;line-height: 1.3;}.selection_container{clear:both;margin-top: 5px;}.cell_label{clear:both;margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:8px;font-size:13px;margin-left: 5px}.cell_input{margin-left: 5px;position: relative;}.submit_button{background-image:url("http://img.staging.webmd.com/dtmcms/staging/webmd/consumer_assets/site_images/sponsored_programs/fit-initiative/sms/btn_submit.png");background-repeat:no-repeat; width: 67px; height: 22px;font-family:Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;padding-top: 10px;padding-left: 10px;float:left;cursor:pointer;cursor:hand;}.standard_rates{float:left;font-style:italic;}.agree_label{font-size:11px;padding-top: 3px;}.disclaimer{margin-top:5px;margin-bottom:10px;width: 274px;font-size: 8pt;line-height: 1.35;}.info_tip{background-image:url("http://img.staging.webmd.com/dtmcms/staging/webmd/consumer_assets/site_images/sponsored_programs/fit-initiative/sms/tooltip_back.png");background-repeat:no-repeat; width: 239px; height: 165px;font-family:Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;padding-top: 10px;padding-left: 10px;padding-right: 20px;padding-bottom:10px;cursor:pointer;cursor:hand;position:absolute;top: 125px;left: 25px;font-size:9pt;line-height: 1.3;}.info_tip_bottom{background-image:url("http://img.staging.webmd.com/dtmcms/staging/webmd/consumer_assets/site_images/sponsored_programs/fit-initiative/sms/tooltip_back_bottom.png");background-repeat:no-repeat; width: 239px; height: 165px;font-family:Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;padding-top: 5px;padding-left: 10px;padding-right: 20px;padding-bottom:10px;cursor:pointer;cursor:hand;position:absolute;top: 204px;left: 25px;font-size:9pt;line-height: 1.3;}.val_tip{background-image:url("http://img.staging.webmd.com/dtmcms/staging/webmd/consumer_assets/site_images/sponsored_programs/fit-initiative/sms/close_back.png");background-repeat:no-repeat; width: 239px; height: 75px;font-family:Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;padding-top: 30px;padding-left: 10px;padding-right: 10px;cursor:pointer;cursor:hand;position:absolute;top: 225px;left: 25px;} Sign Up! 6-Week Challenges Want to know more? 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Johnny Depp at a screening for The Lone Ranger in Las Vegas

Just when you thought there was nowhere left for Johnny Depp to take his Pirates Of The Caribbean character Jack Sparrow (other than film number five, of course), he goes and reinvents him in the Wild West by painting on a new face and adopting a slightly different accent. The actor plays Tonto in The Lone Ranger (which, somewhat unsurprisingly, is by the same Disney cohort behind the aforementioned action adventure): a Native American warrior who teams up with the Lone Ranger (played by The Social Network's Armie Hammer) to fight corruption. The movie, which also stars Helena Bonham Carter, Tom Wilkinson, William Fichtner and James Badge Dale, is set to be released in the UK on 9 August 2013. And the trailer is hilarious. Watch it here.

ACTOR V CHARACTER


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Salma Hayek at CinemaCon 2013

Of all the outfits Salma Hayek could've chosen (her hubby is the boss of the company that owns Alexander McQueen, Gucci, and Stella McCartney), she went for this turquoise pant suit. We admire her guts, but DON'T think it would've been our first choice. 

The Latest Fashion News


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Aspiring to join the Air Force

I am 19 I turn 20 in a few months, I am about 60 pounds over the weight limit for my height, I have started working with a dietician, and a personal trainer. My goal is to be down 80 pounds and to enlist by January 1, 2014.

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What to Order This Week: Starbucks

Looking for something fresh, light and flavorful that you can grab on-the-go? Well, the Starbucks' new Summer Lunch items are just that. Beginning April 30, this new selection of salad bowls and deli sandwiches will be the perfect quick lunch options. Oh, and did I mention each of the Bowls have less than 450 calories a piece?! (Score!) Now you'll have no excuse to order that high-fat Frapp. (Well, you know, unless you had a really bad day...)

Here's the scrumptious salad bowl line-up:

Chicken and Greens Caesar Salad Bowl: A familiar favorite, Caesar salad, is made over with a healthful twist of fresh kale and the addition of roasted tomatoes, all topped with grilled chicken. (With dressing: 340 calories, 25g fat, 19g protein)Zesty Chicken and Black Bean Salad Bowl: A blend of grilled chicken, black beans, roasted corn, jicama, tomatoes, feta, spring greens and protein-rich quinoa is topped with a mild chile vinaigrette. (With dressing: 360 calories, 15g fat, 19g protein)Hearty Veggie and Brown Rice Salad Bowl: Roasted butternut squash and beets are tossed with sliced kale and red cabbage, steamed broccoli florets, garden peas and all topped with a lemony tahini dressing. (With dressing: 430 calories, 22g fat, 10g protein)

And if you need something to wash it all down with, you may want to try one of Starbucks Refreshers. Made with green coffee extract and fresh fruit juices, these drinks are the perfect lunchtime pick-me-up. A tall Very Berry Hibiscus Refresher has just 60 calories, while the Cool Lime flavor comes in at just 40 calories for a tall. Stay tuned later this summer for the debut of the Valencia Orange flavor. Starbucks, anyone?

What are you ordering at Starbucks? Tweet me at @sarahjaneRD and @SELFmagazine!

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Image Credit: Meredith Jenks


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"25 POUNDS IN 100 DAYS" challenge!

At my heaviest I weighed 235 lbs. That was January 2012. Since that time, I've lost almost 30 lbs, gained it back in a pregnancy, and lost a few more since baby has been born (7 weeks ago). 

My goal after pregnancy was to get down to at least 200 by this weekend.

This morning's weight: 200.2.

New goal! 25 pounds in 100 days. Trying to get down to 175 by September 23rd. Roughly 1.8 lbs per week.

I'll be checking in weekly. Feel free to join in!


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FDA Approves 'Abuse-Deterrent' Label for New Oxycontin

Latest formulation is tougher to crush and dissolve, making illicit use more difficultAgency says new availability of doxorubicin will

By EJ Mundell

HealthDay Reporter

TUESDAY, April 16 (HealthDay News) -- In an effort to help curb the epidemic of prescription painkiller abuse, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration on Tuesday said it is approving new labeling for a reformulated version of Oxycontin that its maker claims will be harder to abuse.

The agency also noted that the original form of the powerful painkiller has been withdrawn from the market because it is easier to abuse than the newer formulation.

"Accordingly, the agency will not accept or approve any abbreviated new drug applications (generics) that rely upon the approval of original OxyContin," the FDA added in a news release issued late Tuesday.

Prescription painkiller abuse continues to be a major problem across the United States. According to a report issued in January by the U.S. Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), some 22 million Americans -- 2 percent of the population -- have misused prescription painkillers since 2002.

Oxycontin (oxycodone hydrochloride controlled-release) already has Schedule II status as a potentially harmful and restricted-access narcotic, based on an FDA review. In January, an agency advisory panel voted to move other hydrocodone-containing painkillers such as Vicodin and Percocet to the same status.

One other way to rein in rampant abuse of precription narcotics is to develop formulations that are more difficult to break down and abuse.

The original form of Oxycontin, first approved in 1995, "was abused, often following manipulation intended to defeat its extended-release properties," the FDA explained. "Such manipulation causes the drug to be released more rapidly, which increases the risk of serious adverse events, including overdose and death."

The new, "abuse-deterrent" version was approved in 2010 after being developed by maker Purdue Pharma, and the company stopped shipments of the older version of Oxycontin to pharmacies in August of that year.

The new version is "more difficult to crush, break or dissolve," the FDA said, and it forms a thick, sticky gel that resists being used as an injection. It is also more difficult to manipulate the drug so it can be snorted, the agency said.

"The reformulated product also may reduce incidents of therapeutic misuse, such as crushing the product to sprinkle it onto food or to administer it through a gastric tube," the agency noted.

"The development of abuse-deterrent opioid analgesics is a public health priority for the FDA," Dr. Douglas Throckmorton, deputy director for regulatory programs in the FDA's Center for Drug Evaluation and Research, said in the agency's news release. "While both original and reformulated OxyContin are subject to abuse and misuse, the FDA has determined that reformulated OxyContin can be expected to make abuse by injection difficult and expected to reduce abuse by snorting compared to original OxyContin."

The FDA notes that postmarketing studies looking at the abuse potential of the new formulation are ongoing.


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The 'Learning Curve' of Living With Asperger's

News Picture: The 'Learning Curve' of Living With Asperger'sBy Lisa Esposito
HealthDay Reporter

THURSDAY, April 18 (HealthDay News) -- Asperger's syndrome is disappearing as an official diagnosis, but people who live with its symptoms will continue to struggle.

"I would say that Asperger's is sort of like 'autism light,'" said Liane Holliday Willey, senior editor of the Autism Spectrum Quarterly. "Our verbal skills tend to be more developed, and we have less moments of going inward. We don't present as obvious, so we kind of fly under the radar."

"But our [lack of] ability to read your mind or read your motives is a big red flag," she said. "And that's what gets us hurt physically and emotionally and career-wise."

Holliday Willey, 53, has written books on life with Asperger's and serves as an autism consultant in Grand Rapids, Mich.

"I've had very bad things happen because I couldn't read perspectives," she said. "I'm pretty smart, and I'm educated and you'd meet me at the mall and think, 'There's a quirky girl.' You'd never have any idea how much of a struggle this all is for me."

Certain situations can be too much, Holliday Willey said.

"When I sit down to take a test, to interact with a human, to be on my own without support -- all of these groovy strategies I've created over these past 50 years can disappear pretty quickly," she said. "So I can kind of go back to a more obvious state of autism."

"Now I can take a minute to go reboot my hard drive and figure out how to behave, until it gets to the point where I'm just emotionally tired and I make my exit," she said.

Brian King, a relationship coach for people on the autism spectrum, was diagnosed with Asperger's in 2007.

"I've learned a lot of strategies that allow me to manage," said King, who lives in Illinois. "And if by virtue of those strategies I'm able to manage life more effectively, am I by any means beyond the Asperger's? No way."

He said children with Asperger's need a lot more than just traditional talk therapy.

"You need to work with this child's entire support system -- parents, siblings, educators -- to give this kid the best chance to succeed," King said. "People on the spectrum are unique in the way they're challenged and the way they need to be approached and to learn the skills they need to succeed in life. The learning curve can be huge."

Eric Lipshaw, a 21-year-old student at Oakland University in Rochester, Mich., found out he had Asperger's at age 7.

"Obviously it made things harder with friendships over the years," Lipshaw said. "Social cues, and I was oversensitive to noises and smells. I remember often in elementary and middle school I'd spend almost an hour or two a week in the [nurse's] office. I'd get terrible headaches from the fluorescent light bulbs cycling.

"I was stuck, I was rigid, I absolutely despised changes in schedule," Lipshaw said. "I was pretty much bullied my entire high school career."

"My parents worked their [rear ends] off -- and I'll love them forever for it -- to make sure I was as well-adjusted as I could be," he said.

Today "nobody would realize I'm anything but a little eccentric until I disclose to them that I have Asperger's," said Lipshaw, who has a campus radio show and hopes to work as an on-air radio talent after graduation.

Decades ago, Karen Rodman married a man who "I knew all along was intelligent, a musician, quiet -- but I did not understand to what extent [he had problems]."

It wasn't until many years later that she realized his issues went far beyond being what she called "ornery." The local medical community was no help, Rodman said.

Eventually, as she was contemplating divorce, the marriage counselor pulled her aside. "She told me that she thought my husband had Asperger's syndrome and Tourette's [syndrome]," Rodman said.

Rodman had never heard of Asperger's. She spent the next weekend in book stores reading anything she could find on autism and Asperger's.

"Light bulbs over my head the more I read," she said. "My husband had been living a lifetime with two neurological-biological-developmental disabilities -- and no one knew it except his family, behind closed doors." She boils down her existence as a "neurotypical" -- a term for someone not on the autism spectrum -- spouse to one word: lonely.

In 1997, Rodman founded the international support group Families of Adults Affected by Asperger's Syndrome.

Holliday Willey's father also had Asperger's for most of his life, but only discovered that as an older man.

"My father was 75 when he was diagnosed," she said. "At that point, he said, 'Now I understand why I was bullied. Now I understand why I was never promoted to management.' He was a brilliant engineer. But he didn't have that social communication, that nonverbal communication, those sensory problems adjusted for."

Her mother -- the neurotypical in the family -- had a lot to deal with, Holliday Willey said.

"My mom was under the impression that I didn't like her, didn't love her, didn't respect her. I didn't hug her," she said. "Now that she knows it was not her -- it was our neural wiring -- she'll say, 'Give me a hug if you hate it or not; it's for me.' So I'll hug her and go, 'Eww, that's enough, let go,' and she'll tease me about it."

MedicalNews
Copyright © 2013 HealthDay. All rights reserved. SOURCES: Liane Holliday Willey, senior editor, Autism Spectrum Quarterly, and autism consultant, Grand Rapids, Mich.; Brian R. King, L.C.S.W., relationship coach, Illinois; Eric Lipshaw, college student, Oakland University, Rochester, Mich.; Karen Rodman, president and founder, Families of Adults Affected with Asperger's Syndrome



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