What is your motivation?

Personally i never thought to post on here until now, and i really don't know why... I would love to hear some of the motivations out there, as just losing weight isn't really much of a motivation (or an interesting one).What got you into the get healthy mindset? Id be happy to start with mine.                          I've had weight problems for most of my life.  Around 14 i was tipping the scales at 300 pounds. I managed to lose a boat load around 16 and never really got bigger than 230. I had a gut and man boobies, but i was decently strong (i was a roofer for a while) and always thought to myself, hey, i'm not even close to what i used to be so i'm happy.  This changed very recently, though it has been a culmination of events since age 18. Hmm it's very difficult to say what i want to next without using a massive amount of expletives, because it drives me up a wall to think about it... Since age 18 I've dated 4 women for at least 4 months or longer, the longest being 2 years. All four women cheated on me. Now the first three i always thought, meh whatever, they told me and we broke up... the latest one however (of about 6 months) struck me hard. I had been working as a security guard, which unfortunately packed on a few pounds, and the only way for a full 40 hour week was to work mostly over nights. One night at work i was talking to her and mentioned i was gonna stop by at her house in the morning with her favorite coffee. she was ecstatic and agreed that would be awesome... awesome it was not. I get to her house and upon entering her room, what do i see? another guy laying in bed with her both starting to wake up. Needless to say i was livid, especially when he had the nerve to ask "who the f are you?" to which i replied "im her boyfriend, now before i get myself an assault and battery charge you might wanna get the f up and get the f out!" (i think back to that moment alot, how i had the control to not beat this persons face in is amazing)... i see a condom wrapper on the nightstand and after some tense talking, i walked out. a few days later i get a teary call, with the i miss yous, and i'm sorrys and blah blah blah. Needless to say im a trusting idiot, not to mention this girl was my best friend for years before dating her. so we get back together... not three days after, i show up to her house again, and with a quick kiss she says shes gotta pick up her brother. She leaves through the front door instead of the garage door, which is closer,and i hear her brother upstairs which i find beyond odd. so i head outside to smoke a cig and who do i see... the same guy! i start getting beyond mad and this time im not gonna let this kid get away, she tells him to get into the car. which he does, but the entire time me and her are talking, hes just staring at me smiling this grimy little smile. After all is said and done, i ask her why would she do this to me? why lie, why keep my around? She tells me its cause im the sweetest guy around, she loved me for the caring and sensitivity i have... what i got out of it was  she wanted me around to be the emotional part of a relationship... she then admit's that she doesn't find me attractive anymore, i'm to fat, shes just not into me sexually (apparently she wants a beyond underweight dude, i would put this other guy at about 6'1'' 150 lbs, not to mention i saw track marks the first go around) I haven't talked to her since then. and despite her being my best friend for the longest time i'm not sure i could. My trust, the most important thing in the world to me was shattered twice. So after this long winded sad story what's my motivation? The day after the second time i started a workout regimen, and started using this site to help count calories. I don't ever wanna feel the way i did those 2 nights again.  I have a charming personality or so im told (i'm known as mr. fantastic because of my habit of say "im fantastic" when asked how i am, despite how i may really feel) I found out personality isn't enough anymore or so it seems. I figure if i can add a decent body and healthy lifestyle with it, i might just have enough to have this never happen again. Or at the very least if it does (im sure it will im only 22) i can laugh it off and think to myself, well that was a waist of my time, her loss! Currently i'm down from 230 to 218 with a goal of 175 in mind.My diet is whatever is in the pantry that seems healthier than the rest, lots of tuna in water. o and no soda at all since i joined, just water... my workout involves 1 day of strenuous body weight exercises followed by a day of a few miles walking my dog or light shadow boxing, sunday usually an off day. the pounds are melting off, my boobs are turning to pecs and i can already feel differences in how my pants and shorts fit. The best part is, i can honestly say i feel great, and even better i can really say, Her loss!

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